We get one chance at life, one time through to bring our gifts fully into the world. Career. Love. Parenting. Creativity. Self-expression. Service.
What is holding you back? No matter what your life circumstances, at the end of the day the only one in your way is you. You, and you alone, are responsible for creating the life you want. But you don’t have to do it alone. In fact, you can’t. We need each other.
If your heart was fully yours to express, if your gifts were unapologetically presented to the world, if you were willing to be as bold and as brave as you’ve witnessed men you admire being, what might you do with your one, precious life?
What is holding you back?
Discover and claim your deepest self-expression. When it comes to love, career, and the pursuit of mastery, some of us know what we want but not how to get there. Others aren’t even sure what they would claim if they could. No matter where you are on the path, this weekend is designed to help you to see, claim, and clarify your purpose in all the important places of your life — sex, intimacy, and romantic partnership. Career, money, and being lit up by what you do. Community, connection, and having a group to support and challenging you on the path.
You — we — can’t do this alone. There are few things more powerful in the world than a group of strong, conscious, embodied men willing to challenge, support, and serve one another.
Lack of emotional or physical intimacy (sex)
Poor boundaries (standing up to a boss, a spouse, a child, a parent)
Numbed out — unsure of what you’re really feeling (no feeling = no balls and no heart, which means your life is stuck)
Out of touch with your heart’s purpose
Scarcity in money, love, or life
Challenges with a marriage or partnership that seems to have run out of passion and energy
Feeling you need to manage the emotions of your partner, your boss, your children, or your parents (you don’t, and shouldn’t)
Feeling you’re too intense, or not intense enough
Real masculine power comes being in touch with your heart and your balls. You know these types of men, because they’re rare as the most precious of stones. These men can access an emotionality that is grounded, not weak. They have impeccable boundaries in love and work yet aren’t hard or calcified. They are partnered with powerful women (or men) and able to be in a mature and heart-centered relationship that makes both people stronger than either one. They are strongly independent yet strive to create inter-dependent relationships (not co-dependent). They are vulnerable but still deeply masculine, strong, powerful, playful, and embodied.
The Integrated Man has integrated a strong back and a soft belly so he can get what he wants faster, easier. He knows love, intimacy, community. He is comfortable by himself, and in the stillness of meditation or nature. He knows who he is, what he stands for, and what he’s willing to die for.
In the (very) intensive weekend, you’ll learn to hold boundaries with an open heart; to take in criticism, and challenge but not collapse — or posture. You’ll gain the experience of being more humble and more powerful.
It’s time to transcend ideas of what the masculine can or should be in order to find your own intelligent, skillful, fully alive, highly relational, emotionally sophisticated, and deeply powerful self.
Hot Seat practices — you’ll be placed in the center of a circle and get the full challenge and support of the four leaders
Learning how to be truly embodied — most men are cut off from what’s really happening inside of their bodies, which means they’re cut off from not just their heart but also their balls
Practicing / role playing with the hardest and most challenging relationships in your life
Responding by leading with curiosity —especially when defensiveness and the impulse to fix or give advice are present
The power of ‘both/and’ over ‘either/or
Taking radical responsibility not just of your life, but also of all of your relationships.
Getting out of your victim mindset that blames the other person for how you feel and what choices you think you have
Building your capacity to stay relational and why it matter for your own growth, ambition, and life fulfillment.
How to do this kind of work with yourself, your kids, and your co-workers, in a way that’s empowered and effective
The art of skillful but powerful challenge
Us calling you out on your bullshit, with fierce accountability and loving attunement that will be unlike anything you’ve experienced before
This will be led by experienced men’s work facilitators Jeff James Howard, Marco Lam, Keith Martin-Smith, and Eddie Konold. Jeff and Eddie are licensed psychotherapists. Marco is an acupuncturist, permaculture expert, and community leader. Keith is an ordained Zen priest, published author, and martial arts lineage holder, and Marco and Keith have been in the same men’s group, with the same group of men, for 14+ years.
“Keith had a strong presence, physically and spiritually with meditation and embodiment exercises. Eddy was love and gentleness, killing it with kindness and active, warm, soft reflective listening and precise at picking up relational material to give back and act on. Marco was mindful, honest, and more of a quiet/wise leader and organizer. Jeff was an excellent facilitator, listener, and therapist, coming in with challenges that quickly closed in on the issues at hand, using a knife to sharpen his teeth and go in for the kill.
Watch out! They all worked very well together, cohesive, displayed confidence and therefore trust and a letting go into the work and the group. The container was beautiful and held tighter as the retreat came to a close. I would participate again. I would recommend this to any man wanting more from his relationships.”
— GA, Spring 2022
Images by Luke Shaefer, @lukeschaefervisuals
6-7:15 - Council on the Octagon Deck
7:30-8:30 pm Dinner at Elkstone Farm
8:30- 9:10 pm Fire circle: Turn up the heat
9:10 Close for the night
9:45-10:15- Physical/embodiment exercise
3:30-5- Extended break/wander/practice period
7:30-8:45- Closing circle for the day
8:45-9 — Warrior’s rest/Meditation
9:40-10:00 Physical/embodiment exercise
11:45-12:00- Physical/embodiment exercise
3:45 - 4:20 Circle/teaching
4:20 - 4:30 Break
4:30-6:00 - Closing circle for weekend/Bringing it home
*Price includes farm-to-table, gourmet meals cooked by an on-site chef, and on-site camping with access to flush toilets and showers. Coffee, snacks, and tea provided in the mornings.
For our time together, we’ll gather at Elkstone Farm and be fed from the amazing farm-to-table kitchen there.
Friday 6-10 pm, Saturday 9-9 pm, Sunday 9-7 pm.
Your health and the well-being of our community are important to us. We encourage all participants to be vaccinated before they visit the farm or wear a mask and practice social distancing if they have not yet been vaccinated. We have upgraded sanitation protocols in place, and require that guests follow our policies, which are in compliance with all CDC and county guidelines.